The coin of the realm within the land of narcissism is vanity enhancement. Something that raises vanity is efficacious. Something that lowers vanity is a menace. If you’re a person with a narcissistic persona dysfunction, this usually interprets into wanting a mate who raises your vanity. One of many best methods to do that is thus far enticing youthful girls.
Notice: I’m utilizing the phrases narcissist, narcissistic, and NPD as shorthand methods to discuss with somebody who qualifies for a prognosis of narcissistic persona dysfunction.
What are the advantages of a youthful lady?
Youthful girls are prone to be simpler to impress
Old style gender roles suited many narcissistic males as a result of they virtually assured that their mate can be youthful, much less educated, extra sheltered, and have much less life expertise than they’d. All of this routinely granted the male accomplice a way of superiority and a level of management. He might bask within the glow of his mate’s admiring consideration and respect for his opinions.
In right this moment’s world, if a narcissistic man dates a lady his personal age from his personal social class, she is prone to be his equal with regard to schooling and life expertise. She can be prone to have a job outdoors the house, have her personal cash, and have a way of her personal skilled competence. Consequently, she is not going to routinely idealize her accomplice or look to him for steering. She’s going to anticipate to be handled as an equal.
Youthful girls are valued greater than older girls as “arm sweet”
In our society, youth is a valued commodity. There are few middle-aged Victoria’s Secret Angels or Dallas Cheerleaders. Many narcissistic males consider that strolling into a celebration with a a lot youthful enticing lady on their arm provides to their standing. She will not be actually being valued as an individual. She is the equal of a brand new sports activities automotive—a possession that may get the admiring consideration of different males. Their envy makes his vanity rise.
Narcissistic males are inclined to have shallow relationships
When narcissistic older males date girls who’re significantly youthful, they’re often content material to accept seems to be slightly than attention-grabbing dialog. I don’t imply that youthful girls usually are not as sensible as the lads, simply that being of various generations makes it more durable to have shared reminiscences and customary experiences.
Instance—Jack and Jennie
Jack is in his 60s and his new girlfriend Jennie is about half his age. They had been out for dinner with a gaggle of Jack’s associates.
Jack: I bear in mind precisely the place I used to be and what I used to be doing when President Kennedy died.
Jenny: I don’t assume I used to be born but!
Later, one in every of Jack’s associates stated to him: She could be very fairly. I perceive why you need to have intercourse together with her. However what do you speak about within the morning? Her geography lesson?
In the meantime, one in every of Jennie’s associates stated to her: He’s your father’s age and outdated and boring. Why are you with him?
Youthful girls make the person really feel youthful
Though the person might have bother maintaining with a youthful lady, being together with her and her associates might assist distract him from his personal getting older. Getting older brings its personal narcissistic accidents: lack of energy, virility, or energy. Courting or marrying a youthful lady can really feel like a second probability to expertise youth and maintain getting older at bay for some time longer.
Youthful girls could also be extra naïve
Most youthful girls are simpler to impress than somebody older and extra skilled. Because of this youthful girls usually tend to be enthralled by the narcissist’s tales and never as prone to query the narcissist’s experience. As narcissists love to provide recommendation and showcase what they know, they are going to take pleasure in impressing their younger girlfriend by introducing her to new experiences. Relying on the person’s funds, these new experiences might embrace high-quality wines, costly eating places, and holidays in romantic locations. All of this boosts the narcissist’s vanity.
Many males with narcissistic persona dysfunction view enticing youthful girls as potential status-enhancers—like having a ravishing new sports activities automotive. These males usually are not searching for companions who’re their equals. The younger girls are valued for his or her potential to cater to their narcissistic boyfriend’s ego and for being younger and enticing sufficient to point out off to different males. The second that the girlfriend stops showering the narcissist with admiration, or turns into much less bodily enticing, she will probably be devalued and changed with a more recent mannequin.
Narcissism Important Reads
Based mostly on a Quora reply.